Irish Wedding News
02/05/2013
According to the Daily Mail, social scientists from the University of Arizona found when these sacrifices were made be a partner who is feeling stressed, it can make the stress worse.
An example of such 'sacrifices' included taking on a chore normally carried out by the other person.
As a result, this can lead to an increase in arguments and leave partners feeling taken for granted.
The survey, which was carried out by scientists Casey Totenhagen, looked at 154 married and unmarried couples. The length of the relationships ranged from six months to 44 years.
The daily surveys recorded all their activities from time they spent with friends, to chores they carried out and child care. They were then asked to record which activities they thought to be 'sacrifices', and included those they had done – but were usually done by their partner.
There was also a section reserved for the participants to rank their feelings towards their partners on a daily basis, including how close, committed and satisfied they felt about the relationship.
When it came to looking at the type of sacrifices made, they were small and not significant in terms of how it could change a relationship, but it found carrying out such good deeds while in a good mood made the person doing it feel more committed to their relationship.
However, it appeared to have little effect on the other partner who appeared to feel no different about the relationship after the nice act than they did before. Reasons for this were because they were unaware that their partner was making a 'sacrifice' by taking the washing off the line or emptying the dishwasher.
On the other hand, if the person making the 'sacrifice' felt stressed when they take on the extra task, then they feel no better about the relationship afterwards.
Speaking about the results, Ms Totenhagan said: "On days when people were really stressed those sacrifices weren't really beneficial anymore, because it was just one more thing on the plate at that point.
"If you've already had a really stressful day, and then you come home and you're sacrificing for your partner, it's just one more thing.
"It's really important that couples work on coping with those daily stresses as they occur, before they have a chance to build up."
(JP/CD)
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'Being More Selfish' Key To Successful Relationships
A new study has found that making small sacrifices for your partner when you don't feel like it, could be destructive to the relationship.According to the Daily Mail, social scientists from the University of Arizona found when these sacrifices were made be a partner who is feeling stressed, it can make the stress worse.
An example of such 'sacrifices' included taking on a chore normally carried out by the other person.
As a result, this can lead to an increase in arguments and leave partners feeling taken for granted.
The survey, which was carried out by scientists Casey Totenhagen, looked at 154 married and unmarried couples. The length of the relationships ranged from six months to 44 years.
The daily surveys recorded all their activities from time they spent with friends, to chores they carried out and child care. They were then asked to record which activities they thought to be 'sacrifices', and included those they had done – but were usually done by their partner.
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There was also a section reserved for the participants to rank their feelings towards their partners on a daily basis, including how close, committed and satisfied they felt about the relationship.
When it came to looking at the type of sacrifices made, they were small and not significant in terms of how it could change a relationship, but it found carrying out such good deeds while in a good mood made the person doing it feel more committed to their relationship.
However, it appeared to have little effect on the other partner who appeared to feel no different about the relationship after the nice act than they did before. Reasons for this were because they were unaware that their partner was making a 'sacrifice' by taking the washing off the line or emptying the dishwasher.
On the other hand, if the person making the 'sacrifice' felt stressed when they take on the extra task, then they feel no better about the relationship afterwards.
Speaking about the results, Ms Totenhagan said: "On days when people were really stressed those sacrifices weren't really beneficial anymore, because it was just one more thing on the plate at that point.
"If you've already had a really stressful day, and then you come home and you're sacrificing for your partner, it's just one more thing.
"It's really important that couples work on coping with those daily stresses as they occur, before they have a chance to build up."
(JP/CD)
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