Irish Wedding News
29/05/2013
Researchers at the University of Texas studied 71 young, unmarried heterosexual couples who had been together an average of three years for the survey and found people who are unhappy in their romantic relationship spend more time during a disagreement thinking how angry and frustrated they are, as opposed to happy couples who coordinate their thoughts, so that when one partner has a lot of emotional thoughts, the other has few.
Lead investigator for the study, Doctor Anita Vangelisti, Professor of Communication at the university, said the findings confirm people's thoughts during a conflict situation reflect and shape their own relationship satisfaction, as well as to how it can affect how happy their partner is.
Of the couples who took part in the study, each person was encouraged to privately express his or her thoughts aloud to a researcher - while in a separate room from their partner - and while communicating about a topic of conflict with their partner via a computer chat programme.
The chat programme showed the person's typed messages in one section and the partner's replies and messages in another section, but it did not reveal the person's vocalised thoughts which were tape recorded.
In a majority of cases, couples discussed a topic of disagreement both participants had listed in a questionnaire about conflict issues. Topics of conflict included the amount of time spent together, money, past relationships, alcohol use, and friends and relatives who disapproved of their relationship.
The researchers told the couples they had 10 minutes to discuss the topic and come to a resolution. A researcher sat with the participant in each room and remind them to voice his or her thoughts throughout the interaction. They also discovered that during a discussion involving conflict with a romantic partner, when one person thinks about making excuses or denying his or her role in the conflict, the other partner was more likely to be unhappy in the relationship, than those whose partner did not 'stonewall'.
Those in unhappy relationships were more likely to be inflexible in their thinking and therefore more interested in changing the subject of discussion. They also thought more about how repetitive the discussion felt.
However, when both people in the relationship were dissatisfied, they were more likely to think about the power they had or their partner had in the relationship. They were also more likely to focus their thoughts on disagreement or emotions, such as anger and frustration, at the same time as their partner.
Doctor Vangelisti explained: "We don't have data on what happens when partners change their thoughts, but our findings certainly do suggest that thinking about how angry and frustrated you are - or thinking about how much power is being wielded during a conflict - is not beneficial for the relationship."
Unlike other studies, which found differences between men's and women's thoughts during disagreement, the current study found only one statistically significant sex-based difference in thoughts – that women were more likely than men to blame their partner.
The findings were published online in the journal Communication Monographs.
(JP/IT)
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Women 'More Likely To Blame Men' In Relationships
Women are more likely than men to blame their partner for failings in a relationship, a new study has suggested.Researchers at the University of Texas studied 71 young, unmarried heterosexual couples who had been together an average of three years for the survey and found people who are unhappy in their romantic relationship spend more time during a disagreement thinking how angry and frustrated they are, as opposed to happy couples who coordinate their thoughts, so that when one partner has a lot of emotional thoughts, the other has few.
Lead investigator for the study, Doctor Anita Vangelisti, Professor of Communication at the university, said the findings confirm people's thoughts during a conflict situation reflect and shape their own relationship satisfaction, as well as to how it can affect how happy their partner is.
Of the couples who took part in the study, each person was encouraged to privately express his or her thoughts aloud to a researcher - while in a separate room from their partner - and while communicating about a topic of conflict with their partner via a computer chat programme.
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The chat programme showed the person's typed messages in one section and the partner's replies and messages in another section, but it did not reveal the person's vocalised thoughts which were tape recorded.
In a majority of cases, couples discussed a topic of disagreement both participants had listed in a questionnaire about conflict issues. Topics of conflict included the amount of time spent together, money, past relationships, alcohol use, and friends and relatives who disapproved of their relationship.
The researchers told the couples they had 10 minutes to discuss the topic and come to a resolution. A researcher sat with the participant in each room and remind them to voice his or her thoughts throughout the interaction. They also discovered that during a discussion involving conflict with a romantic partner, when one person thinks about making excuses or denying his or her role in the conflict, the other partner was more likely to be unhappy in the relationship, than those whose partner did not 'stonewall'.
Those in unhappy relationships were more likely to be inflexible in their thinking and therefore more interested in changing the subject of discussion. They also thought more about how repetitive the discussion felt.
However, when both people in the relationship were dissatisfied, they were more likely to think about the power they had or their partner had in the relationship. They were also more likely to focus their thoughts on disagreement or emotions, such as anger and frustration, at the same time as their partner.
Doctor Vangelisti explained: "We don't have data on what happens when partners change their thoughts, but our findings certainly do suggest that thinking about how angry and frustrated you are - or thinking about how much power is being wielded during a conflict - is not beneficial for the relationship."
Unlike other studies, which found differences between men's and women's thoughts during disagreement, the current study found only one statistically significant sex-based difference in thoughts – that women were more likely than men to blame their partner.
The findings were published online in the journal Communication Monographs.
(JP/IT)
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